‘Tis the season for The Break-Up….

 

So earlier this week, Sexpert Dan Savage was quoted in this NPR article / broadcast about breaking up during the holiday season…

Then, a friend of mine had the below exchange on her Facebook page.

The question is – How do you handle those awkward relationship issues duing the holiday season?

Everybody’s got an opinion it seems… what do YOU think Erica should do?

Erica W. Ok so i have a problem. i am dating someone but i come to realize he aint ” that guy”. we suppose to spend christmas together but i am at the point where i don’t want to spend money on him. and i want to end it what should i do. Problem is i care about him

Frances J.
okay let me understand you like him but you just dont want to buy him nothing for Christmas
Yesterday at 5:41pm
 
Pleaze M.
Oh boi…. That’s a tough one cause you already care… That’s the hard part sometimes.. Can’t say what to do cause everyone is different but I hope it works out in YOUR favor…
Yesterday at 5:41pm
 

Erica W.

@ frances i like him but i think i need to end it because he has alot of shit with him. and i just feel like i am settlin and i aint havin that. so should i just end it before x-mas or still spend it with him but don’t spend what i was going to spend?

Yesterday at 5:45pm

 
Maurice B.
when u find out a good way to dump somebody, let me know!!
Yesterday at 5:48pm
 
Ebone J.
I think ywou need to leave….you answered you own question in your responses. You even sound a little disgusted. Dont wait til after Christmas because you will be miserable….enjoy it with the boys and gizmo 🙂
Yesterday at 5:50pm
 
Erica W.
@ thank u pleaze, its very hard one minute its like yep. but i just sit back and listen to him. i learn somethin new about him everyday. its crazy
Yesterday at 5:50pm
 
Devinn L.
I understand u care about him But is it enough that u want to be with him and his shit,get out now before u fall to hard and end up with someone that was only suppose to be in your life temporary
Yesterday at 5:50pm
 
Erica W.
@ebony u are right. i have to go and get giz a outfit lol. how is liz
 
Ebone J.
she’s spoiled as all hell. but seriously if you learning new stuff that often and it’s not attractive keep it moving. Life is short honey…..dont waste it!
Yesterday at 5:54pm
 
Frances J.
MS. Erica just let the guy know you and him can only be friends nothing more nothing less. If you want to swap gifts thats cool. But dont wait until after Xmas due to the fact you will be sending out mix signals. Let him know up front you care but you rather remain a friend.Just my opinion poo-poo. Pray God knows better than us all
Yesterday at 5:55pm
 
Erica W.
@ devin its like i new his situation in the beginning but i still feel like i am settling and i aint going lol.
Yesterday at 5:56pm
 
Kisha D.
well I hope he is not a FB friend, cuz if he is he knows girl! lol
Just be honest with him, the truth will set you free! Most importantly be honest with your self FIRST.
Yesterday at 5:58pm
 
Lydia S.
SPEND MONEY ON HIM…. WHAT!!!!! AND HE NOT DA ONE…
U CARE BOUT HIM….. SPEND DA HOLIDAY FOR FRIENDLY COMPANIONSHIP ONLYYYY!!!! GET HIS ASS A GIFT FROM THE DOLLAR TREE….. THAT CHEAP ASS SOAP OR SOMETHING…… LMAO…. LOVE U CUZ……..
Yesterday at 5:58pm
 
Kiana P.
Don’t ever settle Erica. You said you care about him right? Well since it hasn’t been that long you’re in a good position to tell him the deal. The longer you wait, the more complicated it gets.
Yesterday at 6:00pm
 
Erica W.
@ kiana thank u so much. @ hey punkin me and u think a like. lol@ frances i am all over it.
Yesterday at 6:04pm
 
Robin F.
If your inner voice says you are settling ….. YOU ARE. There is NO ONE worth you giving up yourself to make him happy. Like I told you before … a REAL man NEVER makes you feel anything but loved and desired …. if he REALLY and TRULY wants you …. he will knock himself out proving it everyday. You wont keep hearing the same broken promises… See More …… over and over. Don’t block your blessing for the one God really has for you …… You cain’t let someone go who was really never there in the first place.
Yesterday at 6:04pm
 
STARRING Lee B.
Be blunt wit him stop calling him stop taking calls either he’ll get the pic or start stalking lol
Yesterday at 6:05pm
 
Katrina L.
Always, always, always be honest.
Yesterday at 6:07pm
 
Kiana P.
LMAO @ Lee. Yeah that works too. Lol!!!
Yesterday at 6:07pm
 
Robin F.
You have to really want to make a decision. Then stick to it.
Yesterday at 6:09pm
 
Gayle W.
Be honest and end it if you ‘re just not that in to him. It’s okay. That’s the whole point of dating, to see if you all fit or not. That is also the point of red flags.
Yesterday at 6:21pm
 
Erica W.
@ robin he has did somethings that made me say well okay he do listen to what i am saying. he is trying so i don’t know.Lee i had to delete him from my page because he was on some other shit. lookin through my friends list. lookin to see who’s wall i wrote on. he want to add him back so bad. hell to the naw i straight.@gayle i feel you on the dating thing. and its not like i just met him, i have been knowin him for over 15 years.
Yesterday at 6:39pm
 
Lee B.
I told you the stalking would start
Yesterday at 6:50pm
 
Erica W.
lee i just think he is insecure.
Yesterday at 6:55pm
 
Lee B.
He knows hes losing you!!!
Yesterday at 7:18pm
 
Erica W.
is that what it is.
Yesterday at 7:18pm
 
Lee B.
I feel sorry for him now! by you not communicating with him he probably senses something is wrong so now he has too investigate hmmm the plot thickens!!!
Yesterday at 7:21pm
 
Erica W.
lee and the thing is we been friends since 93 went together when we was teenagers. and then he went his way i went mine. then around feburary we reconnected so its like wtf
Yesterday at 7:26pm
 
Lee B.
Feburary you said it hasn’t been that long that’s damn near a whole year lol you better buy that n*** a Xmas presant lol
Yesterday at 7:28pm
 
Erica W.
like i said earlier i am going to see what he is gettin me. and if it nice then maybe.see i was going to hook him up too i already know what i was going to get then his birthday id the day after xmas. so he betta get it together quick lol
Yesterday at 7:31pm
 
Lee B.
Lol
Yesterday at 7:33pm
 
Elanda T.
right now i cudnt answer that question but for u to want to spend watever on him at one point he had to be worth it. i wud still buy the gift because thats just who i am. its not like u hate him.
6 hours ago
 
Rikki F.
That’s hilarious Lydia. Ok E… I say if you KNOW he’s not the one tell him AND keep it movin….if you’re not sure…pray about it and trust your intuition. I KNOW one thing 4 SURE, you’re a great woman, a hard worker, smart and a damn good mom…you deserve your equal!! If he ain’t what it do…he got ta go..he could be distractin u from “the real deal” love you
5 hours ago
 
Shaniece G.
The scary thing is Christmas is coming up he probably know you aint tryna be bothered with him and he probably thinking of ways to grab your attention again……wat if he ask you to marry him….i mean yall known each other for along time and besides he probably feel like yall got history….girl you better end it now cause this can get out of hand in the future…..basicly wat everybody else said.
3 hours ago
GingerFly’s Free.99 Cents…

Don’t buy a gift.  Remember what Christmas/The Holidays are really about.  Maybe make a donation to the needy in his name.  But most importantly, have a talk with him about your feelings.  Don’t waste time, energy and $$ sending mixed signals that will only cause you more anxiety and complications down the road.  Be plainly honest and to the point.  If you haven’t sorted out how you feel, tell him that too.  A logical, sane man will only understand those terms.  The rest will just be seen as hormonal-weird-women-are-too-complicated-mumbo-jumbo.  

Any drams that unfolds after that is in his court. 
Advertisements